Monday, February 4, 2013


I was watching 'The Good Wife' with the husband last week.  It was an episode where the main character, Alicia, received the opportunity to become a partner at her law firm later to find out this 'prestigious offer' was made to multiple other people.  Hours after realizing she wasnt special, she runs into her husband's opponent and asks if she's 'made any friends lately'.  The opponent initially befriended Alicia to get personal information before jumping into the ring.  The opponent says, 'Alicia, I'm so tired of you playing the victim role.' After that comment a reporter comes up and asks the opponent, the husband and Alicia their religious stance. This is when Alicia decides she is no longer going to be the victim and follow what her husband's campaign manager persuaded her to answer.  She responds that she's an atheist. 

No one likes being called a victim.  So why are there so many out there?  The defeatist who always complains, no matter what.  Even when they receive something that many would appreciate.  'I got a pay raise but now I have to pay more taxes.'

You know the type.

They are envious of what others have but don't recognize the effort that person put in to get to their spot.

I get it. Everything sucks.  For everyone.  You aren't special.  Just because other people aren't complaining, doesn't mean they don't have personal battles.

It cant suck all the time.  And if it does, and all you do is complain, it's going to be a long and lonely victimized life.

If I dislike something in my life I make changes.  No one else is going to fix it.

This is not directed at anyone facing trials currently.  And I'm not saying that I don't complain, it just isn't a constant whine fest.  I try to look at the bright side and recognize that things will get better soon.  And if there is a negative pattern like; unhealthy eating habits, exhaustion, no money, anger, etc, then I make some changes.

You can be an amazing person and help every bleeding heart hoping that will buy some good karma or you can spend that time and energy helping yourself (there's a reason the Self help industry makes millions per year, because it works).

I've learned recently that when things suck to shut it and do a tiny kind gesture (something that isn't energy consuming and that can't turn into a negative).

If a cycle keeps repeating and no significant changes are made, it's intentional victimhood.  It's difficult to make changes.  But what is the alternative?  Trying and failing is way better than not having any faith in our ability to steer our lives.  


  1. Great post! I absolutely agree, make changes where you can and small acts of kindness for others is great as well. I try to also remember, everything is temporary, the good and the bad. Another good reason to appreciate the happy times and not spend so much time and energy concentrating on what's wrong or what you don't have. Sometimes, things are just really hard and you have to just hold on and ride things out but I hear you, there are a lot of full time 'victims' in the world today.

  2. Exactly, Anna! I don't get the peeps who only think about the bad while in the good phase. When they are experiencing negatives it's expected and not a surprise. But then some good comes around and the thought is, 'this won't last, it never does.'. Don't question it. Go with the good! It attracts more good.


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